Causes of Divorce

The causes of divorce are different for every marriage. If you feel you simply must leave your marriage that is a decision that you and no one else can make. At the same time, take a look at the top most common causes of divorce below and see which issues seem most like your marriage. This report is from a 2003 study of the most commonly reported causes of divorce among American couples.

The two nearly-tied top reasons for divorce are actually fixable problems.

1. Infidelity

It can feel like it’s the end of the world if your spouse cheats on you. While repeated infidelity is definitely a reason to leave a marriage, you can recover from a solitary indiscretion. It requires clear communication about how the incident happened, and steps to make sure it doesn’t happen again. Cheating is a sign that there are serious underlying marriage issues that need to be addressed. It’s not necessarily one of the causes for divorce on it’s own.

2. Incompatibility

You must have been compatible at some point to decide to get married. Everybody grows and changes on their own personal journey through life. It’s true, your spouse and you will be a different person than who you married at almost every point in your marriage. As long as you still have love and affection for each other, a happy marriage is completely possible even if you are very different.

3. Drinking or Drug use

Any sort of addiction or substance abuse is a clear sign to get out of a marriage. Because you care for you spouse, it can be hard to know when to leave. If you choose to work together to beat the drinking or drug use, make sure you can see tangible changes and improvement in his/her behavior. If the problems continue, no matter how well meaning you spouse may be, it’s time to leave.

4. He/she is not the same person I married

Growing apart, personality problems and lack of communication are all issues that can be addressed with skills-based marriage counseling. You can learn relationship skills to improve communication, deal with differences and grow closer.

5. Physical and mental abuse

These are the biggest “get out now” danger signs in a relationship. Unfortunately, it is twice a common among women as men to be reported among causes of divorce. If you or your children are being abused, physically or emotionally, leave immediately.

 

Tried counseling and didn’t like it, or have a spouse who refuses to go? Skills-based learning is important to overcoming marriage problems because it gives you the powers to fix current problems as well as ones that come up down the road. Plus, Power of Two can help you marriage even if only you do it. Become a member of Power of Two and see the difference for yourself.